The slippery slope of negative thoughts is a perilous trail that can leave you stuck in the snowbank. It happens to the best of us but does it really have to be that way? When staying at a hotel it is not uncommon to see a ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign or the opposing side which reads ‘Please Make Up This Room.’ When you allow negative thoughts to take up residence in your mind those thoughts if left to do their bidding will hang out the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign and run your mind through the wringer!
This is the second post in this series of short blogs dedicated to helping you get unstuck. Negative thoughts and self talk can be so damaging. They can stop you dead in your tracks! So here are some tips to help you ‘Please Make Up This Room’ by sweeping those thoughts and talk right out of your mind.
Line up the usual suspects who cause you to get stuck; suspect number two please step forward. Do you recognize negative thoughts, also known as negative self talk? Describe this suspect In great detail. Why? Because you want to recognize him the next time he comes around trying to cause you to be stuck. Know your enemy!
THINK about it.
- Is it true?
- Is it helpful?
- Is it inspiring?
- Is it necessary?
- Is it kind?
It is time to tell the negative thoughts committee that is meeting in your head that this meeting is adjourned and you have issued an order to vacate. Active measures that you can take are:
- Make a list of pros and cons. What will really happen if you move forward and what will happen if you don’t.
- Ask and answer–will this matter tomorrow, one week from now, in a month, a year or five years? Many of the things we worry and fret over don’t come to fruition.
- Keep a journal. Write down recurring negative thoughts. Then write down a positive thought to replace the negative one. Here is an example: I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. Change that to: I didn’t sleep well but I’m looking forward to lunch with my friend. Negative thoughts tend to congregate together. If you say one negative thing and just let it linger, it’s easy to give it company to gather with. You can quickly escalate from not sleeping well, to a bad hair day, to the stinking traffic jam, and so on. Misery loves company.
- Stop criticizing your physical qualities. So what if you have a big butt, you’ve got gorgeous eyes! Speaking negatively about your physique is not going to change your appearance. If it’s something you can work on, do it, if not, let it go.
- Comparison is the thief of joy! She’s so talented. He’s so rich. So, so, so! You have no idea how many hours she put in to attain her level of skill. Maybe he was born into it but perhaps he’s worked his tail off to get where he is today.
“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” Steve Furtick
Are negative thoughts and self talk the suspect known to cause you to be stuck? Share your thoughts or experience of getting unstuck.